Miss me yet?

Made this last year. It was funnier then.


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A Response to Upworthy’s Venn Diagram Infographic

The other day the Romney campaign released a graphic showing how Obama had failed on his promise to lower healthcare costs.

Instead of contesting the facts on the diagram, liberals instead decided to mock Romney by saying that it wasn’t a true Venn diagram. They created their own graphic to try to school Mr. Romney.

Unfortunately, there is a problem with their response. The Romney campaign graphic doesn’t actually claim to be a Venn diagram. John Venn developed the Venn diagram in 1880. People used overlapping circles to represent things before 1880, and they still do today. Just because something has overlapping circles doesn’t make it a Venn diagram.

The diagram does, however, make it very easy to see where Obama fail short of his promises. Since they can’t debate the facts of the issue, liberals have to try to distract you with nonsense.

If they really want a Venn diagram, though I’m sure we can come up with one:


Update: Linked by both The Looking Spoon and IMAO

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Anti-Obama Bumper Stickers

The other day I had some ideas for some bumper stickers. I’m no artist, but I tried to put my vision onto canvas…er…pixels.

I think the message in the first one is something that everyone can agree on. Conservatives will agree that Obama is a bad president and liberals will have to concede that body odor does indeed smell bad.


Then there’s:




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General Motors Announcement

The Obama campaign recently announced their new slogan: “Forward”. Not long afterwards, General Motors, still largely owned by the government, held a press conference to introduce their next car: the “Chevy Forward”. In keeping with the name, it won’t go in reverse. It also won’t turn right.

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NSF and Shrimp Treadmills

Recently the National Science Foundation was scolded in a report by Sen. Tom Coburn for, among other things, spending $500,000 to put shrimp on treadmills. Today the NSF responded with a press conference. Below is a transcript.

Okay, let’s get started. My name is, Bill Loney, I’m the directory of research here at the National Science Foundation. As you’ve heard, the NSF recently spent $500,000 on treadmills for shrimp. Now I know several of you have been asking “How could a treadmill costs that much?”. Well, you see, the answer is that the treadmills themselves really didn’t cost that much…only a few thousand dollars or so. The bulk of the cost went into developing a machine that we called “The Mini Maker”. This is a device capable of shrinking any inanimate object to a much smaller size. We then used the Mini Maker to shrink the treadmills so the shrimp could ride on them.

Any questions?

Reporter: How much did it cost to build this shrinking machine?

Let me see, I’ve got the paper with the numbers here somewhere…here it is…$259,294 and twenty three cents.

Reporter: What happened to the rest of the money?

It was spent on destroying the shrinking machine.

Reporter: You spent all that taxpayer money on a revolutionary scientific breakthrough — and then destroyed it?!?!

Yes, the EPA declared that it was bad for the environment — too many harmful emissions.

Reporter: (Speechless)

In hindsight, we probably could have saved some money by going with cheaper treadmills, but the grant money was already there, so we went for the deluxe models.

Reporter: Did you get any useful scientific data from this?

Yes. We learned that shrimp that haven’t been on a treadmill taste better than shrimp that have.

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Possible Herman Cain Slogans

I’m thinking about supporting Herman Cain in his presidential run. His name certainly seems to be the easiest one to turn into a slogan:

  • Raising Cain

  • Hope in Cain

  • How do you beat Obama? With a Cain!

  • Cain is Able!

  • Yes we Cain

  • Cain Can

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Fun Facts about Democrats

With Halloween and the elections both right around the corner, I thought it would be a good idea to compile some facts about something related to both — Democrats.

Fun Facts about Democrats:

  • Democrats can’t enter the House unless voted in. (The Senate, however, is a different story).
  • Democrats aren’t afraid of the dark. They are, however, afraid of Fox News.
  • Democrats like to use the word “racist”. They don’t know what this word means.
  • Everyone votes Democrat after they die.
  • Do not accept a ride home from a Democrat.
  • Democrats scream at things they don’t understand – like people who disagree with them.
  • If a Democrat steals your Halloween candy, don’t worry — you’ll get part of it back as a “stimulus”.
  • The founding fathers used invisible ink to write parts of the Constitution. Only Democrats have the special glasses that let you see those parts.
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